Perseverance: The Long, Long, Long, Long, Long Road.

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Ever been on that never ending loop of doubt, fear, struggle, or even failure?  If you are like most people each of these things has crept into your life at one time or another.  The question that arises is how did you handle it, or did you just let it take you where it wanted to take you?  Perseverance is having the fortitude to keep going, without regard to what might be right in front of you.

We've all had struggles in our life.  I've never met anyone who was brazen enough to even try to get me to think that their life was sheer perfection and those things that tend to disturb others has never played a part in their life.  I dare say that there are many things that we feel are worthy of our perseverance.  It might be a love interest, a new job, or a desire for a new career. You might be in a struggle right now with outside influences that would have you zig when all you want to do is zag.  Often we are forced to persevere because those around us who keep telling you that "it can't be done" don't realize just how big your dreams are, nor your desire to successfully see your dreams come true.

In many cases perseverance is linked to the amount of desire you have for those things you are believing for.  Face it, it's easy to give up or give in when the object you are going after is not really something that you desire.  Flip the coin and now going after something you truly desire is going to add a whole new meaning to the word perseverance.  When you truly love something it is nearly impossible to give up on it.  When you desire something so much, stopping in midstream is just not something that comes to mind.  Perseverance is going after something with everything you have inside.

There will be days when the word quit simply is unacceptable.  Conversely there comes a time when you will have to make a decision as to what brings you happiness, what is dragging you down, and how important is hanging on to those things you really want in life.  We often hold on to things that are not serving us, but because we can't imagine life without them, we find it difficult to let them go, even when letting go would be the best thing for you.  It's like you are being torn apart: what you want, what you desire, and what is in your best interest.  There are times when these two things are counter to each other, but try as you might, you haven't a clue which direction to go in.  It is in these moments where you need to step back, take a deep breath, and ask your heart what to do next.

There have been times in my life when I have quit before I should have, and then there have been times when I should have quit long before I did.  This inability to know the right time often brings the misery that follows certain situations.  If what you are trying to hold on is not serving your best interest, then why hold on to it?  You know deep down what is good and what is not good for you. Often we fail to act on it because of fear.  We are simply afraid to see what life would be like if these situations were eradicated from our life.  Trust me, I have been in this position many times, and each time I must face the unenviable task of making tough decisions.  Making tough decisions is a sign of maturity.  It's not whether you make the right decision that is important, its just being willing to make a decision in the first place.  Remember, you can always go back and right a wrong.

Perseverance is nothing more then holding a belief that what is meant to be will in fact come into being, and nothing is going to stand in the way.  Remember when you were a kid and your mom would tell you that you were not leaving the dinner table until you ate everything on it?  For me my nemesis was zucchini.  So all the neighbor kids were outside waiting for you so they could play Kick the Can and all you could do was sit there and look at the damn zucchini.  Perseverance said eat it up and get outside as quick as you can.  It all comes down to the motivation, and how bad you want something.  If it's worth having, it's worth working for.  If there is something that you truly desire in life, then logically isn't perseverance something that should come easy.

There are no real time lines when it comes to perseverance.  Either you continue to work toward something or you don't.  The question comes down to, how bad do you want something.  There is no right or wrong answer.  There are times when we simply decide it's not worth it and we give in.  You're not a good or bad person if you give up.  Only you can make the decision what is right or what is wrong for you.  However, if you simply give up because things have become difficult, then you are giving up for the wrong reason.  There will be obstacles that come into view from time to time, simply make the determination that you are not going to let them stop you.  Slow and steady wins the race I have been told many times.  Perseverance is taking things one day at a time, one item at a time.

There will be difficulties that arise from time to time.  There will be those who hinder you verses help you.  There will even be times when you have your own doubts as to what is important to you and what is not, that's OK.  Perseverance says you just keep moving forward, even if it is at a snail's pace.  Never give up my friends.  What is meant to be will be, but only if you believe.

What's ailing you?

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A lot of things can come into one's life that seem to get in the way of you doing what you really want to do.  Often they come in the form of comments from others, situations that seem to stop you in your tracks, or simply a not knowing of what to do next.  No matter how you look at it, whatever it is that is stopping you from walking in your destiny is something that is going to ail you, and any ailment is never a healthy thing.

What I want you to look at today is the possibility of you being able to do anything, anytime, and in anyway that your heart desires.  To many this is an impossibility, but as I have discovered over the last few years, I don't believe in impossibility, especially when it comes to one's own destiny.

So what's stopping you from pursuing those things in your life that you hold most dear?  There are many out there, as I've said before, that are stymied by the comments of others.  These people don't understand what is in your heart, and since they are not you, how can they possibly know how important some things are to you?  There are others who have allowed fear to creep into their life.  Fear that what they try will not succeed.  Fear of what others will think about their crazy idea.  I've seen first hand how fear can grip someone.  I've been told many times how difficult it is to get a book published and even if you are fortunate enough to have a book on the shelves, what makes you think it is going to be a success?  I've allowed fear to stop me.  It's wasn't a fear like walking around in a dark cemetery at night.  It was a fear of success.  It was a fear that who was I to think I could change the thoughts of others about destiny, and have an impact on the world.  Fear is never going to get you to the place you were destined to be, and fear is something that we hold on to way to often.

There are people who are in bad relationships.  They know they need to get out of this relationship, but there is something that keeps them cemented in this place.  All kinds of thoughts rush into their head. "I can't be alone." "I never thought I would be in this position."  "I just don't know what to do." I've tried to stick it out in bad situations, hoping against hope that things would change, that I would somehow find a way to right the ship, and what I wanted most would come into existence.  Sadly most of the time all I got was more sadness, more pain, and no rescue in sight.

Walking around in fear, in doubt, in constant turmoil, is no way to live.  If you really want to be happy in life then you are going to have make the decision that those things you desire are there for you, and nothing is going to stop you from having your hearts desire.  When I set out to write my first book I never imagined how it would change my life.  I had pretty much planned out my life and writing a book never even entered the picture.  Sadly what I had done was fill my life with other things, and although they would have brought me notoriety, they would never have brought me fulfillment.  I know what I am supposed to be doing, and everything I do now is leading me to the place I was always destined to be.  The question you need to ask yourself is what are you willing to do, in order to do the things you really want to do?  You can either sit back on the sidelines, or you can take an active role in bringing to fruition those things that need to be done.

Destiny is not something only meant for a few select people.  Destiny is not just for the "One Percenter' s".  Destiny is, and always will be, for everyone.  If you allow the comments or the actions of others to stop you from walking in your destiny, you are the one who is going to be hurt.  I can think of no other thing in life so miserable then staying put in a place that brings you no joy, no peace, and no happiness.

Are you happy right now?  Is what you are doing bringing you endless joy and happiness?  Do you get up in the morning over joyed because you get to do what you love most?  This is what life was meant to be.  This is how life was originally designed to be.  We have allowed man to tell us that there must be strife in life.  We have allowed man to tell us that only a select few will experience the thrill of victory and all others the agony of defeat.  Please, oh please, don't fall victim to the conditioning of man.  Man's biggest ailment is man's expectations, and man's conditioning.  If you can free yourself from the conditioning of man, and realize how divine you really are, I will promise you that there will be nothing that will ail you.

There comes a time when decisions need to be made.  The time has come for you to ask yourself this very simple question:  am I happy?  This is not a question that can be answered by anyone but you.  Let's be honest, if you're not happy and content with your life at the moment, why would you want to stay put?  If, on the other hand, you had the ability to find true happiness and fulfillment, is there any reason you would not jump into it with both feet?  I've know sadness and I've know happiness, and it doesn't take a Rocket Scientist to recognize which one is better.

If there is anything ailing you, then take the time to make it right.  In the long run you will be happier, those around you will be happier, and the the rest of the world will be a better place for you being in your proper place.

Surviving the darkness before the dawn.

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They tell me that "Hope" springs eternal. I've also been told that it's always darkest before the dawn.  I live with hope each day because there are things that I desire in this life, and anything that I desire must be laced with hope, and why is that?  Because hope is what drives us to take another step. Hope is what secures in us the feeling that things will reach a desired outcome.  Through all the ups and downs,  through the darkness of what some are going through, there is a knowing that the light of dawn is just about ready to peak over the horizon.

I have hope for the future, and I want you to have hope for the future as well.  When one is going through a rough patch it isn't always easy to remember that what we go through is necessary.  I've had times in my life when all I wanted to do was lay down in absolute submission, in the hopes that I could just close my eyes and it would be over.  I've had moments when I felt like I had lost all hope.  Funny thing about hope, when you have it, it doesn't go away, not even was facing insurmountable odds.  Now I know people who have lost hope.  Hope is still very much present in their life, they simply have let situations and circumstances blind them to that hope.

I want to encourage you today to look at things a little differently.  I want you to imagine a life where dreams come true, where you can have anything you desire, when you always seem to be at the right place at the right time, and where magically things just fall into place when you need them the most.  What are you feeling when you think about this happening?  That my friends is the foundation of hope.  Now there may be times when hope seems fleeting.  We've all had those moments when things have gone mad, when things just seem to self-destruct.  You can't figure out why what you want seems to elude you, and why in heavens name can't you ever just have a normal peaceful day?

 What are some of the things you are hoping for?  A new home, a new car, that promotion at work that comes with a very nice raise?  I for one am hoping that the New England Patriots can have a perfect season, win the Superbowl again and finally shut Don Shula up.  We have hope for lots of things in life, and I am here to tell you that there should never come a time when you give up on those things you desire most in life.

Outcomes may never come at the specific time you want them, but rest assured they will come in the perfect time that you need them.  When hope seems to have faded in your life I want you to understand that you are still here, still living, still breathing, and because of this fact, hope is still very much alive.  I've been working with a dedicated group of four ladies who share my vision for True Destiny, our company dedicated to helping others discover and walk in their destiny.  We have been creating vision boards over the last few weeks.  These vision boards are all about what we hope for in regards to what True Destiny will be doing in the not too distant future.  I look at these boards and hope tells me that everything on them will come to pass, and together we are going to create a company that will ultimately change the world.  Now there will be people who will think we have gone mad thinking we can change the dynamic of the world, but the hope that resides in me will not allow me to believe otherwise.  Hope is never measure by what other people feel or think, it is only measured by your ability to hold on to that hope and realize that you have it for a very specific purpose.

I can't think of anyone in this world who has created something unique, something remarkable, or achieved a level of success, who first did not have the hope to do something.  Hope and desire go hand in hand.  Hope is desire, and desire is hope.  There will be those who feel that luck may play a part in getting something accomplished, but luck is never going to assure anything, while hope is always going to pay off dividends in the long run.

I love what today's blog photo says, "With hope we can find our way even through darkness.  But without it we lose our way in daylight."  Hope, as I've said before is what allows us to get out of bed each morning eager to take on the day, hopeful for what lies ahead, and profoundly willing to look at life and realize that you have a part to play in it.  Always know that without you something very big would be missing in this world.

My hope is that each person I come in contact with will eventually discover and walk in their destiny.  It is my hope that others will also help people discover and walk in their destiny.  I love that I have hope for the future, hope for what will happen tomorrow, and hope that what needs to happen will happen when the time is right.  I get up each morning with hope, and I go to bed each night with that same hope.  What are some of the things you are hoping for?  Do these things bring you joy?  Do they bring you peace?  Do they bring a smile to your face just thinking about how grand it would be to have every desire in your life?  Then let hope spring eternal, and let hope be the thing that you hold on to.  Hope will always let you know that even when you are walking in the darkest moment, that the sun will shine tomorrow and you will have the opportunity to have all you want.

When do adversities turn into lessons?

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There are some who never have to face adversity, they are the lucky few.  For the majority of the world's population adversity can and does come in various shapes and sizes.  The question I find myself asking is why?  The response that I always get is that there is always a lesson to be learned.  Not always what you want to hear, but none-the-less this one thing should bring you a bit of comfort.  Now comfort is all about how you look at things, and how you look at things is going to be in direct correlation to how you see yourself.  If you see yourself as the victim, then my guess is that adversity is something that is going to set you back, ruin your day, or otherwise make a mockery out of your life.  On the other hand, if you see yourself as the divine creation that you are, well adversity is nothing more then your opportunity to spit in its face and let it know that you are not going to fall prey to those thoughts of defeat or rejection.

I've experienced my share of adversity in life.  Now what I have gone through is not as bad as what others have gone through, but how we handle each problem is going to determine the real outcome.  If you simply see adversity as something put in your path to trip you up, you undoubtedly are going to feel as though you are unworthy, or worse still, that somehow this adversity was sent to you so you could experience an epic fail.  Let me say neither is correct.  Trials and adverse situations should be seen as an opportunity to learn something .  I get how maddening they can be at times, but look deeper into them, and after you have had time to really digest the event, you just may find the silver lining that forms around this dark thunder cloud.

I know that everything I have experienced in life has brought me to the place I am at right now.  I have learned certain things that have prepared me to do the things that I am doing right now.  I would be a lair if I told you that there weren't times when I felt like quitting.  I've also had moments of doubt, absolute frustration, and at other times moments of sheer anger over what was taking place.  We are humans, who happen to have human emotion, and I don't think there is anyone who hasn't wanted to just scream out "I've had enough."  One set back does not make you a failure.  One emotional outburst does not make you a nut.  One "Shit, Damn, or f*#k" does not mean you have to be sent to the corner of the room to serve out your penance.  Adversity can either make you stronger, or it can push you down deeper into feelings of unworthiness or failure.  The question you have to ask yourself is how are you going to begin to react when you face adversity?

If you believe as I do that life's lessons are there to teach, then accept the teaching.  If you believe as I do that adversity is a character builder, then accept this and be stronger for it.  It all comes down to how you see things, and once again that is dependent on how you see yourself.  Failure does not define you, and adversity is not a definer of who you are, nor what you are capable of.  Face it, adversity sucks.  No matter how you look at it, most of us believe that adversity comes at the wrong time.  But the wrong time, is anything but wrong if you believe in the perfection of the Creator of the Universe, and in that perfection is nothing but perfection.  I understand how difficult it can be to see perfection when you are facing a bad situation, but just for a moment set aside what you are feeling, and go back to what you know: you are perfection, and anything that happens is happening in the perfection of who and what you are.

I hate facing bad situations, after all I'm human just like every one else.  That being said I have found myself being able to separate what is happening with who I am.  Let me explain.  There was a time when I felt like everything that was happening was happening to me as a punishment, or that somehow I was unworthy of the good that others around me were experiencing.  My own view of me was one of victim, one of deserving of bad tidings, and one who simply was never going to get what I really wanted.  It wasn't until I was able to grasp the significance of who I truly am, that things began to turn around.  Now that's not to say that things didn't still continue to happen, they did, and I did my best to look at them differently.  I began to see these challenges as learning opportunities.  Once I was able to do that, I began to see the significance of all that I had gone through in my life up to this point in time.  Each challenge brought me more clarity.  Each adversity showed me things that I needed to learn.  When you can change the way you see things, then you change the way you live things, and when you change the way you live, you change your entire environment around you.

Look at adversity as one of the greatest teachers you have.  Breath deep when adversity comes and understand that good will come from it, even if you don't see it right in the moment.  The truth in all of this is this:  if you never face adversity, then you may never know just how much you can do, or even of more importance, just how great you really are.  Inside of each person is a power. This power is there to get you through the tough times.  This power is there to get you up when you have been knocked down.  This power is there to show you in no uncertain terms just how magnificent you really are.  No one sets out on any given day asking for adversity to come, but the wise person will learn from it, and from this knowledge move one step closer to the destiny that is yours.

What have I learned?

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To say that I have learned a lot over my life time is an understatement.  To say that I have learned so much about myself over the last two years is an understatement.  To say that I have learned much needed lessons over the last 30 days is equally an understatement.  No matter how old or young you might be, you will always be in a mode of learning.

As babies we learn to depend on those around us for what we need.  As adults we have been conditioned to believe that if we are going to get something we have to get it ourselves.  "Learning" is never going to be able to be condensed down to just a few important things.  When you look at life each lesson is of great importance and value, because each lesson is meant to bring you to a place that was always intended for you.

Many times we learn things the hard way.  You didn't believe your mom when she told you not to touch the hot stove or burner.  You did it anyway, and you learned your lesson the hard way.  I didn't believe my parents when they tried to instill in me the desire to save money for a later date.  Consequently I developed some very bad habits, habits that took years to break, and habits that did me no good what so ever.

Not every learning experience comes at the hands of something bad.  We can learn from the good times, we can learn from laughter and joy, and we can even learn while watching those sappy Christmas Love Stories on the Hallmark Channel.  The key to learning is realizing that it is for you, and it is there for a reason.  Some of the greatest lessons we learn in life come from very small packages.

I've fought learning in the past.  I've fought those things that I had decided I didn't want to learn.  Problem with this scenario is that the more you fight it, the more difficult life can get, until you finally surrender and grab hold of those things that are needed.  There are times when we allow our ego to get in the way of the lessons that were intended for us, and when that happens you can almost bet there are going to be issues.  I've had to repeat certain lessons countless times, but each time I got one step closer to where I was supposed to be.  It wasn't always fun going through these lessons, but in the end I had to admit there was merit to what I had gone through.  Each of us will endure life's lessons, and if you are wise you will learn from each one.

I was scrolling through Facebook this morning, and as often happens spirit showed me something very transforming.  The Dali Lama said this, "When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know.  But if you listen, you may learn something new."  Learning is a surrendering of your will.  It is saying that you need what others have, what others know, and what others are willing to share with you.  I don't know everything, and there is no one on the face of the earth that knows everything.  If one can replace their ego with a willingness or openness, then you have created an environment for learning.  This environment will take you to new heights.  It will set you on a path of enlightenment, and it will change your life forever.

I learned a long time ago that I don't have all the answers, but what I do have is the ability to get those answers.  They may not always come in the form I thought they would, but if I open myself up to learn, then I can be assured that I will learn.  I can't possible tell you everything I've learned while in this mortal body, just as you could never tell me everything you have experienced and learned.  Suffice it to say, each of us have had learning opportunities, and each of us will continue to have them. The simple truth is that we will be learning until we take our last breath.

So here are a few things I have learned:  I am divine.  I am a spiritual being who is looking to become more spiritual.  I am not what I own, or what I do, or even what others think or say about me.  I am just as spirit intended, and I am doing what I was placed here to do.  Now I can't do it all my self, and I have had to learn to allow others to help me.  This was a very tough lesson to learn, but I am so glad that I learned it.  I've learned that at the core of every person is beauty and love, albeit, it is often covered up by situations, or by surroundings, but at their core is goodness.  I've learned that I can accomplish those things that I dream about, and I will accomplish them in the appointed time.  It took me a while to learn that my timeline was not always the right timeline.  Truth be told, I still have to remind myself of this from time to time.  The greatest lesson I learned is that each of us have a destiny, and the world will be a much better place when everyone is operating in those things there were destined for.

Don't be afraid of learning, and never be afraid to admit that you still have a few things to learn.  The sign of maturity is to show others your ability to continue to learn.  Yes learning can be difficult at times, but oh the rewards for learning are far and above worth it.  Keep learning, keep living, and keep loving.  When you can do all three of these things, you will be in a very good place, and you will know that you have found your home.

Choose your side: either it's yes or it's no.

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Every day we have decisions to make.  Some days the decisions are simple, do I wear a cardigan or a hoodie?  Other days the decisions are monumental, do I leave or do I stay?

Some people have made an art out of making difficult decisions.  Provide them the information they need and they are quick to decide and more often then not, the decision is the correct one.  On the other side of the coin is the person who vacillates between doing something or staying put, saying something, or remaining quiet.  You also have the ones who jump from side to side on decision making.  One day it's simple, and the next excruciatingly difficult.  I wish I could tell you that making decisions is always simple, but alas I cannot.  What I will say is that the mistake most people make is they are tossed about by what others think, by what others say, and the decision that is made is often not in their own best interest, but in that of those who have tried to have input in the decision making process. I learned a long time ago, that following my heart, my intuition, was the best formula for finding success in the decision making process.

I have been guilty of putting off decisions.  Mistakenly, I felt that if I could just not look at the issue, it might somehow magically just go away.  Well, not so much, I still had to contend with what was in front of me, and more often then not the problem got bigger and more complex with each passing minute.  Now there might be a bit of dramatic flare in that last statement, but the point I want to make is that you need to relax and just decide.  Problems are never going to go away simply by ignoring them, and if you are able to jump right into them, making that decision to handle whatever it is that you are facing, well then, most of the time things tend to work out, and work out better then you thought possible.

When we choose sides there can't be division.  Either you're all in, or you are better off not taking the leap.  Fear and trepidation are sure ways of having a mis-step and then it's ass over tea kettle as you try to gain back your balance.  Fear and worry are things that can never be allowed into the decision making process.  Fear and worry never brought any good to anything, least of which your own sanity. I've made decisions out of fear or worry and I will tell you all it got me was more fear and worry.

I've known people who were so afraid to make a decision for fear that they would make the wrong one and so did nothing, and what would happen, chaos.   We're all going to wind up making bad decisions from time to time.  If you are depending on information from others to help in making a decision, and that information that you received was flawed in some way, chances are you are going to make a bad decision.  That doesn't make you bad, it just means you weren't provided what was really needed in the moment.  Goodness gracious, very rarely is any decision final.  I mean you can always go back and fix things.  We have so allowed the fear of failure to stop us in our tracks that the only outcome because of that fear is more failure.  When did it become a sin to make a mistake, or to mess something up?  We're all going to fail at one time or another, so don't let that stop you from taking a stand and doing what you feel is right.  Those who can't accept failure or mistakes are idiots.

Certainly there are times when decisions are made that can and often will change one's life in a dramatic way.  It is in those times when you have to know what your heart is telling you to do.  I have seen people frozen and unable to come to a decision for fear that it will alter things in such a way that they are no longer recognizable.  To allow fear of the unknown to sway your decision one way or the other is nothing more then asking for trouble.  I guess there are people out there who feel it better to just stay in the place they are at verses take the risk of making the wrong decision and then what will they do.  I will tell you that indecision is just as bad as making the wrong decision, and often the results are far worse then if you simply move forward and if a mistake happens simply fix it.


So what do you think?  Do you think you have what you need to make the difficult decisions about things?  Is you can do attitude largely dependent on the nature of the decision, or the complexity of the issue?  For me decisions are decisions, and the difficulty of a situation or the complexity of the issue is not something I really concern myself with.  There are times when I may have to work through a problem, one step at a time, but taking a little step is far better then taking no steps at all.  The bottom line is either you are in, or you're not.  Either you are willing to take a stand, or you are going to be beaten down by the comments, actions, or feelings of someone else.  I am of the mind that if I am going to wind up in a mess I would rather it be at my own hand and not someone else.

So what's it going to be: are you going to say yes or say no?  Are you going to tell fear and uncertainty to take a back seat and move forward in those decisions that need to be made?  I promise you that any decision good or bad is better then no decision at all.  Remember, you can always fix a mistake, what is more difficult to fix is "Stupid".  Think about it...