Looking Back

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There's an old saying, "If we fail to look at history, then we're doomed to repeat it."  Although I whole heartedly agree with this statement, I also believe that there are way too many people who only live in the past, therefore denying their ability to live in the present, and I might add, with zero hope of the future.  There are times when it's good to look back at things.  Most of the time, if wisdom is your guide, the moments you look back on will bring you joy, and not fear or dread.

What I want to do today is motivate you to step forward and stop allowing what may or may not have happened in the past stop you in your tracks.  Face it, you are never going to look through the side or rear view mirror in your vehicle and see what is in front of you.  I've known people who have made it an art form of living in the past.  Everything is "Remember the time", or "There was a time..."  Don't misunderstand me, I think it is perfectly fine to think back on things.  It's perfectly normal to remember those times that brought us joy, and even those times that were not so perfect.  The problem arises when we allow those times to define us, or even worse, restrict us from pursing future endeavors for fear that we might fail again.  Shit, I've failed more times then I would care to admit, but I'm still here, and I'm still doing what I know to do.

I was reflecting on this blog the other night.  I've been writing it for several years, and there's probably four or five hundred post that have been published over the last five or so years.  As I was thinking about the hundreds of thousands of words that have been written over that time, I was taken back by the sheer enormity of what I have tried to accomplish through my writing.  Now I may never know the lives I've touched with the words that I've written, but I believe there has always been a purpose for my writing.  Truth be told, if only one person in the entire world gets something from one of my post, then all the efforts over the years are well worth it.  I've never sought to monetize this blog.  Certainly there are ways to make money blogging, and I'm not opposed to making money that is for sure.  That being said, money has never been my motivation and I have tried to never be moved by what something can or cannot make me.  Looking back, I could always second guess myself and wonder what would have happened had I allowed advertising and such on this blog.  Would I be wealthier then I am right now, or would my motivation have been focused on something completely different then it is focused in on right now?

Let me give you one simple key to really get you headed in the right direction today:  if all you do is wonder what could have been, then what you are doing is continuing to look in the side and review mirror and all you will see is what is behind, and each thing you see will be getting smaller and smaller as you drive forward.  Look forward, and move forward.  Always remember that what is behind you is not nearly as important as what is right in front of you.  Think of it this way: if you're traveling down the highway at 75mph, do you look out the front window, or do you try to navigate your way down the road only using the review and side mirrors?  Trust me, your trip will be cut abruptly short if all you are using to focus on is something already gone by.  I know it seems as though I am beating a dead horse, but trust me, far too many people are living in the past and that is never going to help you with forward momentum.

Looking back, in moderation, has some merit, but that merit is diminished when the main focus is on all things past, and nothing of the present or future.  I'm a big fan of living in the moment, realizing that each moment is leading me to the next moment, and then the next, and the next.  I spent years playing the "What-if" game.  I've wasted more time and energy worrying about things that I could never change, because let's face it, things have already happened and you can't change what has already happened.  Still I was stubborn and refused to get out of my own way because I was bound and determined to change that which could never be changed.  Take my advice and get off the bandwagon of "Always Looking Back".  It might seem like the right thing to do, but constantly looking back is going to do nothing more then bring more regret, more sadness, and in some situations anger and violence.  Face it we have enough anger and violence going around right now in this world, do you really want to add to it simply because you refuse to look forward and only look behind you?

Looking back can teach, but those lessons will be short lived if all you do is live in the past.  There are times when I would love a do-over.  There are even times when a do-over of a do-over is desired. That being said, what could you possibly learn from a do-over that you haven't already learned from the experience you just went through?  Do-overs will never change the fact that each thing we go through in life has been set in front of us to teach us something.  Now there are those who will never learn the lesson, but they will continue to repeat things until the lesson is learned, that I promise you. Why not take from each situation those things that were intended to come out of the situation and learn from them.  Certainly lessons can be tough from time to time, but living in the past is going to catch up with you sooner or later, and when it does you are not going to like the results.

It's OK to look back at certain things with fondness.  Where peril comes in is when we look back at things and only see regret.  Regret and $2.95 might get you a hot cup of coffee.  Forget about regrets and instead look at the lessons learned and count your blessings that you in fact did learn something from the experience you may have just gone through.  Look back if you must, but keep it brief, keep it simple, and by all means keep it moving.  Remember a rolling stone gathers no moss.