It's a hard knock life...or is it?

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Most of us have gone through periods where things just didn't go right, didn't seem right, or just didn't appear to be what we really wanted. Some of us have been through times where we were down and out with no apparent exit strategy for getting out of the muck and mire.  For others, there have been deep moments of depression, almost inescapable.  No matter how hard life may have gotten, no matter what you may have gone through, there is a reason for each of these events, and an opportunity to learn.  No one ever said that learning was painless, but learning is always profitable.

I as of late have found myself looking deeper at things.  I tend to do this when a shift is coming.  I like shifts.  I like change, but alas I am human and sometimes change can be a little scary.  What I want you to do today is begin to look at things a little differently and maybe in doing so you will learn that not all things that appear to be bad are really meant to be bad in your life.  I have been through so many ups and downs over the last 15 or so years.  There have been times when I really wanted to put a gun to my temple and pull the trigger.  There have been times when I scaled the mountain tops and saw the beauty that was life.  We all go through different periods with different results but the key to any period is to learn from them.  If you fail to learn you are going to go through it again, no matter how painful it may have been the first time.

Our existence is cyclic.  We have always been and will always be.  Now some people will argue this point, but truth is truth.  Everything in the universe is energy.  The 1st Law of Thermodynamics says that one can neither create nor destroy energy.  That means that all the energy that is here right now was here from the beginning of time and will be here until the end of time.  Now you can call the energy that is you anything you want.  You can call it spirit, soul, essence, it doesn't matter.  The point I want to make is that you have been around the block a few times.  You have experienced the ups and downs of life a few times, and you have been given the opportunity to learn from them.  We go through certain phases of life to get us to a specific point.  If we can't get to the specific point then we will get the opportunity to navigate it again until we get where we are supposed to be.  I see people all the time who fight things.  Go ahead and waste the energy, you are going to go through what you are going to go through to teach you what you need to learn.  My advice is pick up on the lesson as soon as possible and move on with life.

I'm asked the question all the time about people who struggle and why them and not someone else.  I look at people all the time and wonder what their plight in life is and why it's theirs and not another persons.  I look at people and wonder how many times they have gone through an event and instead of being joyful only found hurt and pain.  I look back on my life and certainly there have been things I never want to go through again, but I did learn from them.  Now the learning may have come after many years, but eventually I could look back on things and see exactly why things happened the way they happened.  Let's be honest, if you have never gone through a trying or difficult time in your life can you ever really appreciate the really good times of life?  I not saying I seek after difficult times, trust me, difficult times will find you whether you are looking for them or not.  What I'm saying is that instead of running away from bad times look at them as an opportunity to really grow and in that growth you will find the joy in the situation.

I'm not going to sit here and tell you that I know what you are going through, or what you might be feeling or thinking.  I hate it when people do that to me.  We all have different paths and what I go through is going to be different from you might go through.  What isn't going to change is the reason you or I are going through something.  I can empathize with people and their various struggles or setbacks.  I can reach out and offer comfort when something bad happens to a friend or family member.  What I can't do is make people learn what they are supposed to learn.  There is nothing worse then that person who is always telling you they told you so or that they knew the exact outcome of what you were trying to do, and they told you all about it before you ever started on something.  You almost want to slap the crap out of them.  What I want you to see is that no matter how difficult situations may seem, or how lousy life might be there is an opportunity to find the joy.  Joy being brought into any situation brings more joy.  I know that may not be much consolation, but when you're up to your ass in alligators its nice to know there is a boat on the way to pull you out.

Life may be a challenge at times, but boy isn't it nice to know that you are still around able to face the challenges?  You are here right now because there are still things you need to do, things you still need to learn.  My advice to you is to take as much life as you can get and run with it.  Enjoy life, share life, be life to others.  The lessons you have come through may be the lessons you can share with others and make their challenging times a little less daunting.  

Life can be full of hard knocks, but each hard knock is a knock on the door of opportunity.  Yes that may sound corny, but it's so true.  Embrace challenges and know that growth, knowledge, strength, and stamina are going to come out of each one.  Remember you are here right now because you are supposed to be here right now.  Walk in your destiny and share your life with others.

Forgiveness, what a concept!

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The power of forgiveness can never be overstated.  The power of forgiveness can never be taken for granted.  The power of forgiveness is sometimes one of the hardest things to come to grips with.  Most of us have had to forgive in the past.  At times it may have been simple and at other times almost impossible.  Ironically, what seems to be the most difficult things to do is forgiving ourselves. Yep, I said it, forgiving one's self is often the most difficult thing in life.  There's an old saying that we should forgive and forget.  Easy to forgive, not so easy to forget.  When we mess something up we often refuse to forgive ourselves, and this is a monumental mistake.

Why is forgiving ourselves so important, and at the same time so difficult?  Why, if we are to forgive and forget, can't we seem to forget when we are the one who is involved with the need to forgive ourselves?  All good questions, and ones that I hope I can answer for you.  The first reason we find it so difficult to forgive ourselves is because we simply haven't been taught the importance of it.  If you are constantly holding a short coming or a mistake over your head how will you ever get over it?  You won't and that my friend is why you will never forget about it.  If you are constantly thinking about all your mistakes how can you move forward with anything in your life?  We have to realize that because we are human we are imperfect beings.  Now we are perfect in our design, but because we have been conditioned by man since birth we are anything but perfect in our actions.  This is no fault of your own, but rather the fault of well intentioned people who tried to tell you what you could and couldn't do in life.  The conditioning of man must be removed from your life if you are ever going to take your rightful place.  Now I'm not saying that all that you have been taught is wrong, but to be honest a large segment of it is wrong.  We spend so much time trying to comply with the list of do and don't that we never spend any time simply figuring out who and what we really are.  Let's be honest, you have been told what to do, what to believe, and what you should be since you were born.  If you are depending on others to chart your life path, you are already going in the wrong direction.

The main reason we find it so hard to forgive is because we have been conditioned to think that mistakes or mishaps are always our own fault and it's happening to us because of some short coming.  Utter hogwash if you ask me.  We make mistakes because we are human.  We cover up mistakes because we have been told if we are not perfect then you need to leave.  People in authority need to learn that there is no such thing as perfect.  What we need to do is accept our imperfections and be happy that we always have a chance to make things right, even if we messed up in the first place.  People who think they are perfect are fools.  Fools, fools, fools.  It really pisses me off when I see people who have elevated themselves up to such a majestic height that they are beyond mistakes.  It doesn't work that way people.  We are fallible.  We will make mistakes.  If you can admit that, then you can forgive any mistake you make, no matter how big or small.

We have been told that if we neglect history we are doomed to repeat it.  The same line of thought can be said about forgiveness.  If we are unable to forgive ourselves we are doomed to repeat it, time and time again.  As the picture states, when we forgive we are set free. We are set free from expectations.  We are set free from judgments.  We are set free from feelings of unworthiness.  You are in fact so worthy of every good thing.  The only reason most people don't see this is because they have fallen prey to the conditioning of man.  Man says we have to feel guilt and remorse.  Why should you feel guilty or remorseful for making a simple mistake?  Did you do wrong on purpose or did you do wrong simply because you're human?  If you did it on purpose, shame on you.  If you made a mistake because you simply made a mistake, cut yourself some slack and make sure you forgive yourself.  No one is going to go through life never making a boo boo.  No one is going to go through life without just one "Oh Shit".  No one is going to go through life not knowing what it's like to come up just a little bit shy of the mark.  The sooner we can accept this, the sooner we can learn that self forgiveness is the only way to go.

I've made more mistakes in my life then I'd like to admit.  I never planned on making the mistakes, they just happened.  If I was unable to forgive myself then I would be nothing more then a hurting, empty individual.  Will I make mistakes in the future? Most likely, but that's OK.  Will I come up short on a goal or dream? Probably, but that's OK.  Will I be able to forgive myself?  Absolutely, and that's very OK.  It's time that you start looking at things differently and start cutting yourself some slack.  Forgiveness is freeing.  Forgiveness is uplifting.  Forgiveness is really your only option if you want to be all that you can be.  Forgiveness is a great concept, but a concept you need to buy into.  Forgiveness is the first step in taking your rightful place in the universe.  Forgiveness is what you should always strive for, and it is something that will never ever hurt you.

We all know what it's like when we have not received forgiveness from others.  It hurts, and you wonder what you did to deserve such a slap in the face.  Well, it's the same thing when you can't forgive yourself.  Don't put yourself in a box by not being free to forgive.  Life is so worth living, why would you want to blemish it by a failure to forgive.  Trust me, when you love yourself you are so much better at loving others and receiving love from others.  If you can learn to forgive yourself, then it is much easier to forgive others and receive forgiveness as well.  Trust me, walking free from guilt, shame, and self-loathing is much better then carrying those things around with you.  Trust me, and yes forgive yourself for all the things gone by.  It's never too late.

A time for every season.

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Can you feel it?  Can you sense it?  The smell of Spring is almost in the air.  For those of us who have come through a very cold and snowy winter, we are biting at the bit to get on with Spring.  With each passing season comes change.  Some people like the differences that each season brings, while others would love to have that constant, never changing, always lovely tropical sensation each and every day.  Where ever you fall on the spectrum of likes or dislikes can we at least agree that there is a reason for each change, and with each changing season comes newness and birth.

Every human has different seasons that they go through and come out of in life.  Some of these seasons bring the result of growth, knowledge, and in some cases wonderment.  Other times in our lives we walk away wondering what just went on and a hope that it never happens again.  Either way, no matter how you look at it, these changes or seasons in our lives, bring us newness and birth.  The birth of a new idea is always exciting.  The newness of a brand new home is exciting.  The simple fact that you lived to tell about it is exciting, no matter what you just went through.  We have different seasons in our life because we need to change things up.  The Universe in it's perfection knows when and how to change things up.  Certainly there will be times when we run screaming and yelling because of the change, but change is going to come, and most of the time, we will grow from that change.

Our loved ones go through different seasons and often they may not always correlate with the seasons of our lives.  When this happens we often question things, but rest assured that any change that comes to those people who surround us have come for a specific reason.  The old adage that you need to roll with the punches is very appropriate.  Certainly there will be times when we don't understand what we or others are going through, but rest assured there is always a reason.  We should learn from what we go through, and if you choose to disregard the lessons, chances are you will have an opportunity to go through things again and again until you pick up on it.

I was outside this morning taking our dog out to do her business.  It was sunny, not much wind, and of course mud everywhere.  As much as I dislike mud season I also know that it is something we have to go through to get to the beautiful months of summer.  Life is no different in that we will have to go through certain things in order to get to the best part of our lives.  The question arises then, what is the best part of our lives?  Truth be told, the best part of your life is the moment you are in right now.  Face it, we can't change what happened in the past.  As much as we may want to alter the past all we can do is live with the results of the past.  We learn from the past, we try to incorporate each lesson into what we are facing right now, and we hope that tomorrow we see the results of all of our efforts.  I wish I could tell each of you that you will never have to face a situation that is less than perfect.  I wish I could tell you that your life is only going to be a series of up and no downs.  You and I will face trials in life, different seasons that is, but with each season we have an opportunity for growth and newness.

I want to challenge you to accept change when it comes and understand that it is in front of you, not to bring suffering, but rather freedom.  I want to challenge you to be open to change and look for the silver lining.  When we fight change we are only fighting against ourselves.  When we are open to change then we are accepting the perfection of the Universe and with it all the goodness that comes from change.

I know that change is coming for me, as change is coming for you.  Just like you will never stop the seasons from changing, you are never going to stop change from coming into your life.  Will you take hold of change and accept it for the goodness that it is, or will you continue to fight it?  The decision is yours to make.  As much as I dislike winter, and as much as I love the summer in Maine and the fall, I know I have to go through the other seasons to get what I love most.  Life is no different and the sooner you accept these truths the sooner you can let go of uncertainty and doubt.  Change should excite you because life should excite you.  You are not the small child you used to be, you have grown.  If you are wise you will continue to grow and that growth will come with change.  If you fight the change you fight the growth, and then it's a lose lose proposition.  My advice is to embrace change, smile at adversity, and hold fast to your dreams.  One of the great things about dreams is that they will never change.

There is a time for every season, and you are here at the perfect time.  Embrace what comes your way and understand that it comes to you not for your harm, but for your betterment.  Tomorrow brings hope and hope is what sustains us during those troublesome times we all face.  I know it's muddy now, but soon it will dry up and I will see the beauty that comes from the change of seasons.  You will see all the beauty in the change that is coming and you will love what you see.

Bright, brighter, brightest.

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Do you remember those old light bulbs that with each turn of the knob they would get brighter and brighter.  There it was, bright, brighter, brightest.  It was a fantastic invention as there were times when you just wanted a little light and other times when you wanted it to radiate throughout the entire room.  Well would you believe that you can have that same reaction with others?  There are times when we simply exist, not showing much of anything.  There are other times in our life when we are at full power and our illumination lights up the entire room.  We control how our light is administered, and we should always be in control of what we are showing others around us.

The question arises then what to do when your desire to shine just doesn't exist?  Face it, there are times when we're just out of it.  You could be looking out into the ozone somewhere, zoning.  We've all been there.  Our flame seems to be out.  Now this can be the result of so many different things.  Most of the time it happens when we are feeling less then satisfied with where we are, what we are doing, and most importantly, where we are going.  Fear not my friends, this is not a death sentence.  We all face those times when things aren't going according to plan.  We all have those days when it might have been better to stay in bed and just sleep it off.  Heck, we've all been in those situations where we just don't have an answer.  Fortunately this has a simple fix.

When you are faced with the situation when things just aren't going according to plan, go back to your happy place.  That happy place should be where you are able to recognize who and what you are, and that you are here for a purpose, a reason.  The amount of light that you put off is in direct proportion to the amount of light you let into your own life.  Remember that love begets love, light begets light, and the more of each you allow to enter into your own life then the more you can transfer to others.  Unfortunately there are many people out there who refuse to let love in.  They claim they don't need love.  Those that claim they don't need love are probably the same people who have never really experienced it.  Don't fool yourself, you will never achieve all that you want to achieve without love pulsing through you.  You'll never be able to accomplish your big dreams if you aren't sharing love with others.

When you are walking around in darkness it's awful hard to know what is in front of you.  When you are walking around in darkness it's nearly impossible to move in the correct direction.  Darkness is nothing more then the absence of light.  What is better: walking in light or staying in the darkness? Some people feel they have to stay in the dark, not true.  Light is so much more powerful then darkness.  If you don't believe me try lighting a tiny match in a dark room.  Trust me the light will overtake the darkness.  I feel as though most people have had dark moments in their lives.  Now most are able to come through these moments, but there are others who are in perpetual darkness.  I think a life in perpetual darkness is not much of a life at all.

So the obvious question is how does one go from bright to brighter, to brightest?  First you have to accept you.  If you are constantly trying to be something you're not then you are going to have a very difficult time lighting up a room.  Authenticity is so key, and yet too many people try to get through life being someone else.  If you can't find it in yourself to love your self, then what makes you think you'll be able to receive love from someone else.  We are perfect simply because our creator is perfect.  The sooner you can accept that you are indeed a very special person, the sooner you will begin to radiate light to others.  I don't know why so many people have an issue with someone who is confident in who they are.  I know that I am someone who has amazing gifts and talents.  I'm not saying that to brag, I'm saying that because it's true.  That being said, it's no less true for you as well.  We have all been given tremendous gifts and talents. Problem is someone down the line said we shouldn't be so high on ourselves.  Well I'm here to tell you to begin being high on yourself.  You are special, you are unique, and you are so incredibly gifted and talented it's almost scary.

If you want to turn up the energy in a room, turn up your energy.  If you want light to shine, shine your light.  You control how much you give out.  You have been given a tremendous opportunity.  You have the opportunity to change the world.  Yes, you!  The time has come to crank it up a notch or two.  There are people who are walking around in darkness because they either don't know any other way or they have yet to walk into you.  Your light must become their light.  Your strength must become their strength.  There are plenty of people out there with wants, maybe it's time you showed them what light means and what that light can do.

Over the top!!

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Is it possible to dream too big?  Is it possible to loose yourself in your dreams?  Is it possible to have all you ever wanted and then some?  I've asked myself all of these questions many times in my life.  There have been times when I answered differently to one or more of these questions.  I guess the way you answer these questions is going to be largely dependent upon where you are at the moment.  Personally I don't think you can ever dream too big.  I am a believer that dreams are in our lives to lead us to a particular point.  Now there may be times when dreams seem far, far away, but they are still something you think about and there's nothing wrong with that.

I've had people criticize me for dreaming to big.  As some have said, my dreams are over the top.  Over the top for who?  I don't think they're over the top for me, and if they're not over the top for me then I guess I should still go after them, right?  So many people who feel some people dream too big are the very same people who have probably given up on their dreams.  I get how one might want to quit on their dreams.  Life has a way of kicking us in the you know what, and if you get kicked hard enough there's always that chance you might decide that certain things just aren't worth it.  Funny thing about dreams; they don't go away.  You may successfully forget about a dream for a period of time, but I'll bet you dimes to donuts that the dreams you've had and discarded will ultimately come back to look at you right in the face.

Why is it that some people refuse to accept their own dreams, but are more then willing to cheer on others as they pursue theirs?  This has always been a mystery to me.  Sadly there are people who refuse to acknowledge that they have dreams.  Contrary to what some may think and say, we all have dreams.  Certainly there will be people who will not own their dreams, or even speak of them, but you can rest assured we all have dreams.  Some dreams are small and others huge, but a dream is a dream, is a dream.  I've seen people who try to morph their dreams into another persons dream.  Note to self:  that doesn't work.  You have your dreams for a very specific reason, and trying to tie them into someone else is not the way to do it.  Trust me, once a dream is accomplished the answer as to why you had the dream in the first place will be answered.  There is no coincidence when it comes to our own dreams.

So why am I spending so much time writing about dreams?  Sadly, there are too many people who have given up, and I for one want to help them get back into the fight.  Let's say your dream is simple and not at all inspiring, at least you don't think it's inspiring, so what!  Each dream, no matter how big or small is a stepping stone.  You can't get down the path of destiny if you always step away from the steps that are in front of you.  Why in the world would you want to walk around in the willwacks when there is a clear path in front of you?  Why do so many people make things complex when they really are so simple?  Once again, one of life's mysteries.

I want to remind each of you that everything you see today, be it simple or complex, began with a dream from someone.  The web page you are on to read these words, stated with a dream.  The phone, or pad, or computer, started with a dream.  Everything has a start, question is, will you finally start going after what you have dreamt about for years?  Timing is important, but starting something is just as important, and if the timing is off, you'll know, but you still have the opportunity to start it over at the right time.  The old adage, "if at first you don't succeed, try, try again", is appropriate wouldn't you say?

Now least you feel you are all alone when it comes to going after your dreams, fear not.  I am just as guilty as the next person when it comes to putting things off.  You see we put things off because often we are scared of the outcome.  We are frightened of failing.  We are shackled to those old feelings of we aren't good enough and it won't work out.  I deal with these feelings all the time, and most everyone else does as well.  Don't let fear stop you from going after those things that mean the most to you.  I'm talking as much to myself right now as I'm talking to you.  I have big dreams, over the top dreams, and there are times when I need words of encouragement spoken so I don't give up.  We are all human, but we are all great humans, and we can't forget that.  We were created to create, so don't you think it's time to start putting the pedal to the metal and move ahead with your dreams?

Dreams will always be around because you will always be around.  The moment you give up on your dreams is the day you begin to die slowly.  Dreams will keep you young at heart.  Dreams will inspire you to continue on.  Dreams will ultimately be what gets you to your destiny.  Who doesn't want to walk in and understand their own destiny?  Who simply wants to go through life never experiencing joy and pure happiness because you have achieved a goal or dream comes to pass?  If you say it's not important to you then I would say you've given up way to soon.  Life is a grand experiment and we are the subjects of that experiment.  Why not take the experiment as far as you can and get the most out of it.  I'm telling you, dreams are there to move you forward.  A real dreams should bring you goose bumps when you think about it coming to pass.  There is nothing better then sitting back and seeing a dream come true.  Your dreams may seem too big or too over the top, but don't let that scare you.  You have the right dreams, and you are the right person to see them come to pass.  Get out there and experience life to the fullest, and grab your dreams and never let go.